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Funny iPhone Stories That Are True |
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Written by Elliot Dean
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Friday, 11 June 2010 03:14 |
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The iPhone is slowly taking over the world, but with total domination comes some amusing occurrences. Here are 5 funny iPhone stories that are unbelievably true!
 1. The man who was nearly killed by his iPhone
American fitness freak Travis Gohr had a near fatal experience with his mobile phone. Mr Gohr was running on a treadmill as he did most mornings when his iPhone fell off, hit the surface of the treadmill and was flung back towards him. The phone hit him in the head at a considerable speed, causing him to lose balance and fall off the moving treadmill. The man suffered lacerations to his back and was nearly knocked out cold. Makes me think that an Apple a day does NOT keep the doctor away!!
 2. The woman who got pregnant because of an iPhone app
Lena Bryce (not surprisingly another American) had been trying to conceive for four years, but had been unsuccessful. Then 2 months after downloading the Menstrual Calendar app on her iPhone she became pregnant. The iPhone app tells women when they are most fertile and it obviously did the trick. Lena named her baby daughter Lola, although maybe she should have taken a leaf out of Gwyneth Paltrow's book and called her Apple. OMG two apple jokes in a row, that's lame!
 3. The teenage girl who sent 300,000 texts in a month
A teenager from Sacramento sent more than 300,000 text messages in one month, and surprisingly, she doesn't have arthritis yet! Maybe thanks to the touch screen system. Crystal Wiski sent an average 10,000 text messages per day, which is 421 messages an hour, and 7 texts a minute! "I get cramps" she told One Black Goat. Can't complain though, I love a girl who is good with her fingers! We never found out just how much her phone bill cost. If she had unlimited texting I'm sure she would have been getting pretty close to breaching the providers Fair Go policy!
 4. The orchestra that uses iPhones instead of instruments
The Apple iPhone has become the musical instrument of choice for a university orchestra in Detroit, Michigan. The ensemble has foregone using normal instruments in their orchestra in favour of musical applications downloaded to their iPhones. The iPhones are attached to speakers and provide a combination of familiar and weird sounds. The instruments also use the phone's GPS and digital compass which are built in, and detect which way the phone is being held to produce a certain note specific to whether it's being shaken or tipped. Ah the future!
 5. The man who survived the Haiti earthquake thanks to his iPhone
The Dan Wooley was making a movie in Haiti when the devestating earthquake struck the poverty-stricken region. The US filmmaker was crushed by a pile of rubble but learnt how to treat his wounds using an iPhone first-aid app. Called Pocket First Aid and CPR the app gave him instructions on how to make a bandage and tourniquet for his leg, and how to stop the bleeding from a wound on his head. |
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Last Updated on Monday, 16 May 2011 00:19 |
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Written by Elliot Dean
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Saturday, 14 November 2009 01:59 |
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Here at One Black Goat we aren't just about the goats. We also like to crap on about other animals too. Check out these weird and wonderful animal facts:
A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.
Penguins can jump 6 feet in the air.
Kangaroos and emus cannot walk backwards.
Beavers can hold their breathe for 45 minutes under water.
The smallest bird in the world is the Humming Bird. It weighs less than 1 gram.
Elephants are the only animal that can't jump. Fat fucks!
A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.
Flamingos are pink because shrimp is one of their main sources of food.
Reindeer eat moss because it contains a chemical that stops their body from freezing.
The coyote's scientific name (Canis Latrans) means 'barking dog'.
Snakes can see through their eyelids.
A Woodpecker can peck 20 times per second.
The praying mantis is the only insect that can turn its head 360 degrees.
Butterflies tast sensors are in their feet. They taste their food by standing on it.
Katydids have ears in their front legs.
The strongest animal in the world is the rhinoceros beetle. It can lift 850 times its own weight.
The slowest mammal on earth is the tree sloth. It only moves at a speed of 6 feet (1.83 meters) per minute.
A dingo did not create the cheap web design company website. Neither did a fly!
The Chameleon can focus its eyes seperately to watch two objects at once.
Flamingos eat with their heads upside down to strain the water out of their food.
Australia's black bulldog ant is the most dangerous ant in the world. It bites and stings at the same time and has killed humans.
A hippopotamus can stay under water for up to 30 minutes.
Armadillos, opossums and sloths spend up to 80 percent of their lives sleeping. So do unemployed people. |
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Last Updated on Tuesday, 04 May 2010 05:16 |
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Midgets and Dwarfs Uncovered |
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Written by Elliot Dean
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Thursday, 12 November 2009 07:42 |
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Midgets and dwarfs are well known across the entire world and everyone has had an experience with the "little people" at some time in their lives. But far fewer people actually know the difference between these two small phenonmenons, which is why it's time more people did.
Dwarfism is most commonly caused by achondroplasia, which results in disproportionately sized arms and legs. Officially, the term "dwarf" is generally used to describe a person with a medical or genetic condition resulting in an adult height of 4'10" or less.
The term "midget" is sometimes used to describe a proportionate dwarf. In other words, midgets are proportionately small all round. Since it has bad associations with old circus freak shows, the term is not very politically correct these days. This doesn't alter the fact that there are some amazing midget facts, which I will present to you now:
If You Are Under 5 Foot Tall, Then You Are Legally A Midget.
When Midgets Reach 30 They grow Rapidly, It Is Not Known Why.
You Can Fit Over A Hundred Midgets In A Mini.
A Midgets Genitalia Are The Same Size As Tall Persons, So Ratio Wise They Are Huge.
The Shortest Man In The World Is India's Gul Mohammed, Height Is 22 Inches Tall.
Apparently Midgets Hate Been Called, Shorty, Midget, Titch, Squirt, Action Man, Polly Pocket, Gary Coleman, Mini
Most Midgets refuse To Wear Childrens Clothes, Therefore They Spend Hundreds Of Pounds, On Having Clothes Made For Them.
A Midget Eats As Much Food As A Normal Man, But Cant Eat As Much At One Time.
Midgets Suck At Basketball!!! |
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An Eyeful A Day Keeps The Doctor Away |
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Written by Elliot Dean
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Thursday, 12 November 2009 07:40 |
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Staring at women's breasts is good for men's health and makes them live longer, a new survey reveals. Researchers have discovered that a 10-minute ogle at women's breasts is as healthy as half-an- hour in the gym. A five-year study of 200 men found that those who enjoyed a longing look at busty beauties had lower blood pressure, less heart disease and slower pulse rates compared to those who did not get their daily eyeful.
Dr Karen Weatherby, who carried out the German study, wrote in The New England Journal of Medicine: "Just 10 minutes of staring at the charms of a well-endowed female is roughly equivalent to a 30-minute aerobics workout. Sexual excitement gets the heart pumping and improves blood circulation. There is no question that gazing at breasts makes men healthier. Our study indicates that engaging in this activity a few minutes daily cuts the risk of a stroke and heart attack in half. We believe that by doing so consistently, the average man can extend his life 4 to 5 years."
She added that sexy stars like Dolly Parton, Heather Locklear, Anna Nicole Smith and Demi Moore had proved to be especially good for the men's health.
by Jonathan Hayter
Check this out...you may live longer! |
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Funny Joke - A Really Bad Day |
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Written by Elliot Dean
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Thursday, 12 November 2009 07:38 |
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There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour.
Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry."
"No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away."
"I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."
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